How To Tell If You Have True Friends…

And when people stop becoming one..

Photo by Chang Duong on Unsplash

Over this last few years, and after the death of one of my best friends, I’ve had to do a lot of thinking. It’s not always been pleasant, and often it’s been fuelled by the emotional rollercoaster that is grief, but it has helped me to realise a few things about friendship.

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN “FRIENDS” AND FRIENDS

I’ve had a number of friends through the years, and I’ve had a number of “friends”, too. In the past, I was just grateful for any friend that I had, but now, I think I’m beginning to realise that often, these people weren’t true friends; they weren’t the sort of people that I could call in the middle of the night if there was an emergency.

They weren’t the sort of people that I could stay up all night, talking to about nothing very much, and still have something to say, and they weren’t the sorts of people that would make time for me when I needed it, even though I always did for them.

FRIENDSHIP IS ABOUT GIVE AND TAKE

I’m not trying to sound judgemental, or make out that I was the perfect friend. I wasn’t. Far from it. The thing is, that a friendship is meant to be about people meeting each other half way. It is supposed to be a fifty-fifty, where sometimes one person needs a bit…